F. Kim O'Neill is the author of the recently-released Paladin book, The Ultimate Guide to Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse. We had the opportunity to interview him about zombies, survival preparedness, and the end of the world.
How is The Ultimate Guide to Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse different from the other zombie guidebooks out there?
I’m not terribly familiar with other zombie guidebooks; my immediate impression is that they’re written by individuals who don’t have my direct personal experience with combat and urban survival. Anyone can claim to be an expert on anything, especially in today’s culture of 24-hour news cycles and style over content. What I can definitively say about my text is that it is the only one I know of that directly and comprehensively addresses the idea of surviving not only a zombie attack, but also the concerns that come with surviving the end of civilization.
Why did you write this book? And why should we listen to your advice on zombies?
I wrote this book because of discoveries I made during my previous position as head of security at CERN (The European Organization for Nuclear Research). A non-disclosure agreement forbids me from going into too much detail. As for why you should listen to my advice, I can tell you that I’m a veteran of the U.S. Army and retired after thirty years at the rank of Major. I’ve seen combat in Southeast Asia, Eastern Europe, and the Persian Gulf. Some of my time was spent teaching at the Army’s SERE school (Survival, Evasion, Resistance, and Escape) in Fort Bragg, North Carolina.
Do you really think that we are going to face a zombie apocalypse? How soon?
Again, I can’t talk about what I know specifically, but I will say that the information in my book is more timely than anyone would care to believe. There are scientists of my former acquaintance who, under the guise of discovery and curiosity, are undermining the very foundation of physical existence. Without going into too much detail, consider this news story:
http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/04/05/freaky-physics-proves-parallel-universes/
That’s old news to the physicists at CERN. They’ve been doing experiments like that for some time. Think about it: they could see the tuning fork move in this universe, and simultaneously not move in the other universe. If you can see something, you’re going to want to touch it. It’s human nature. That’s all I’m going to say about that.
Have there been any zombie uprisings that governments have kept secret? Like what happened with aliens at Area 51?
If there have been zombie uprisings in the past, I don’t know about them. It doesn’t seem likely, though. If the recent Wikileaks fiasco is any indication, it’s extremely difficult to keep a secret about anything, let alone the dead rising to attack the living. As for Area 51, don’t be silly. It’s ludicrous to believe that a bunch of extraterrestrials would master interstellar space travel, only to incompetently crash into a planet.
Does the way in which zombies have been treated in pop culture help or hurt the effort to prepare for a zombie apocalypse?
That depends. A more cynical person would say that the popularity of zombie mythology has made it more difficult to prepare for the zombie apocalypse, as you now have more competition for needed resources. I personally don’t believe that. The more people who prepare themselves and their families for the eventuality of the undead destroying civilization, the better chance we have, as a species, to survive. When it happens, it won’t be a surprise. And it could be that groups or towns of committed, prepared individuals would keep a zombie uprising from becoming the end of the world. It stops being a joke or a pop culture symbol when you’re the one fighting off a recently-turned friend or spouse suffering from a sudden craving for human brains. Your brains.
Is it futile to even attempt to survive a zombie uprising?
Of course not. It’s not futile to attempt to survive anything. The information and skills I impart in the book are designed to take you, the untrained but interested person, and turn you into a survivor. The notion of learned helplessness is addressed several times in the book: don’t wait for the government or the cavalry or the police department to save you. Save yourself.
In the book you discuss the three types of zombies. Which are we most likely to face, and which one is the most formidable foe?
It’s a tricky question. Viral Zombies are considered by “experts” to figure most prominently in any zombie apocalypse scenario, and what we know about biology and chemistry would seem to bear that out. Their physical toughness and communicability of their affliction make them formidable. Supernatural Zombies present a different set of difficulties, not least in an existential sense. The possibility of Supernatural Zombies tells us that modern physics is a joke, and that magic/sorcery is real. That’s difficult to wrap your head around when that becomes your new reality. As for Voodoo Zombies, they’re particularly dangerous in that they occasionally wield weapons. Each type has its own set of dangers; the book describes this and how to overcome them.
How do you kill a zombie? Aren’t they already dead?
Well, no. They’re not dead, but undead. Animate. The simplest answer is to destroy the zombie’s brain. That turns it off like a light switch. Then it’s no longer animate. But that’s a lot easier said than done. What if you’re dealing with two zombies? Or five? Or fifty? In the book, I describe weapon selection, undead fighting tactics, and zombie combat drills that can help you burn ghoul-killing techniques into your muscle memory. Zombies are slow, but they also don’t bleed out from a bad cut or lose morale. And there are likely to be a lot more of them than you.
If you could only have one weapon to use against a zombie, what would you choose?
An AR-15 semiautomatic rifle. Reliable, excellent at long and close ranges, and you won’t have to worry about your bullet bouncing off the curve of an undead skull: it’ll drill right through it.
During a zombie apocalypse, do you think that we have more to fear from the living (that is, other human survivors) or the undead?
It depends on where you live. In the book, I mention how you should stay away from large cities at all costs during the zombie apocalypse, because one of the many dangers there is the likelihood of meeting hostile human survivors. Small towns have their problems, too: the local chief of police may decide to declare martial law with him as the Supreme Leader. If you live in the country, you’ll probably have to arm yourself against roving bandits, cannibal families, and unprepared former city-dwellers. Luckily, what works against zombies (catastrophic brain injury) also works against the living.
What do you have in your zombie bug-out bag?
I’d rather not say. I’m prepared. Are you?
What if I do all the things that you suggest—fortify my shelter, assemble a bug-out bag, gather my arsenal, lay in provisions—and nothing happens. No zombies appear. Won’t I look foolish?
You might. But who cares? Most people would rather be comfortable than safe, which is why so many of us are victims of crime. Don’t worry about outward appearances too much, but be aware of going overboard. You want to be prepared, but this also means that you don’t want to draw attention to yourself. If everyone around knows that yours is the house to go to when the world’s coming to an end, you’ll soon find yourself in the unenviable position of fighting off both the living and undead. Would you rather be armed, fed, and in a well-stocked Zombie Redoubt, or cold, hungry and alone against the undead because you’re too embarrassed to buy a case of Dinty Moore beef stew at the Wal-Mart? Preparation is a way of life, not a goal.